If you’ve been reading the blogs like this one

Or you’ve seen any of my tweets like this

Then this week’s FUCK IT UP FRIDAY will be about as expected as a sore bum after mardi gras a curry

After stopping for coffee at a petrol station this morning

We were walking back to our car

When a little blue car zoomed right by us, into a parking space

Changed it’s mind

Went in reverse

And floored it

Doing a massive backwards u-turn

Covering half the parking lot

Almost running me over

No shit

Dad actually pushed me out of the way

It was coming so fast, I barely had time to react

I watched the car pull into another spot

And a lady got out

She was about my age

So you know, old enough to know better

But obviously still too young to give a fuck

I walked over to her and said, “I don’t know if you’re aware or not

But when you were zipping around back there

You nearly hit me

And would of, if my Dad didn’t have the reflexes of a ninja you dumb botch”

She’s like, “Yeah, I saw you”

Me, “Wuh?

You nearly hit me”

She said, “But I didn’t, so I don’t see what the problem is”

Me again, “Wuh?”

I was a bit taken back by her ‘i could giveth not a fucketh’ attitude

She walked off, “…See ya”

What the fuck?

All I could come out with was, “Oh…OK then yeah….bye…you have yourself a great day then..keep on keeping on ‘n all that

And driving like a CUNT”

I’m such a wordsmith

If you haven’t seen this clip yet

Check it out

And you’ll truly know why the term ‘WTF’ was invented

I think my judgmental bone is attached to my vomit bone

‘Cause I feel seriously grossed out after seeing this

In fairness, he’s not hurting anyone

And he’s the first to recognise that what he’s doing isn’t the ‘norm’

But, wow dude

Just, wow.

Here is my beautiful dog

And then here’s some other random ginger mutt

That just sold for $1.5m

Yeah, that’s MILLION

For a ranga-red-headed dog

I’ll stick with the blonde one thankyouverymuch

They called the million dollar Mastiff, Big Splash

I would say he ‘mastiff’ been a  BIG RIP OFF, with a dumb name

Big dogs like that need manly, strong, tough guy names

Like Fluffy