Walking around downtown Durban

It became pretty obvious that Hollywood had been there first

(You remember how good of a driver he’s NOT, right?)

And had packed his ‘special’ driving skills to bring with him to South Africa

Bless

Then Mum & I went to the markets

And bought some stuff that I guarantee we won’t wear

Ever

But couldn’t resist at the time

Like these stunners!

We Skyped my girls when we got back to the hotel while we were still wearing the hats

And Miss 6  & Miss 4 were like, who are those beautiful hats for?

We LOVE THEM!

So that’s their presents sorted then

As you can tell by the above pic

The locals thought we were utter fucktards

No biggy

It’s not like we didn’t know that already

We stopped to see a street play on the way back to the hotel

There was probably 200 people standing around watching these guys perform

They weren’t speaking in English, so they kind of lost us

But the crowd were going crazy for them

One of the actors had his face painted white

And a fake pregnant belly on

As we walked past

He stopped, pointed to us, said something

And the crowd ROARED!

So we just smiled and waved

Trying to pretend like we knew what he said

Then he said something else

And everyone turned to look at us

Busted out laughing

And started pointing too

Mum’s: Why are they laughing at us?

What do you think he said?

Me: No doubt something about how totally hot we look in our new hats

Mum: You think?

Me: No. He probably said , hey there goes my sister! The blonde one!

With the white face & the big belly just like me!!

Mum: Yeah, that makes more sense

 

Nice Mum

Nice

My Mum’s always been a sports nut

That’s another area where I take after my Dad

Since I can remember, she’s played everything

Hockey

Softball

Tennis

Swimming

Golf

She’s just got to be moving at all times

Where as Dad & I are really good at staying still

Comatosed even

When she sits down at the end of the day

She usually falls asleep within minutes ’cause she’s gotta be fucking knackered

With all of this craziness sport comes the inevitable injuries

She’s broken her wrist, her fingers

Been stitched up from arsehole to breakfast from head to toe over the years

This is where I think the whole, ‘exercise is good for you’ becomes bullshit

‘Cause if it’s so good for you, it shouldn’t hurt, right?

But all of that doesn’t seem to bother Mum

So, it was no big surprise when I got a call from Mum last week

Telling me that she was on crutches

She’d been playing softball and was sliding into home base

And when she got up, she’d split her leg open

And I’m like, dude – aren’t you playing like old people veteran’s softball?

Maybe you guys should be wheeling each other into home base

Not sliding into it

Like kamikaze ninjas on crack

And she’s all, oh fuck off don’t worry, I’m fine

I’ll have the leg brace off in time to play in the finals next week

.

And that right there is where I have learnt my theory on parenting

.

If you can’t be a good example

Be a horrible warning