So what are you guys hoping for this year?
A sleep in?
On my kids list for Santa this year?
“A piece of a rainbow” – Macaroni
“Big boobs like Mummy” – Magoo
I really hadn’t thought about it
I’m too concerned with how to get a fucking chunk off a rainbow
And a boob job for a five year old
The kids have already made me some homemade gifts
Which are completely awesome – love them!
But there’s not really ‘one’ thing that I really wanted this year
That’s always the best part about Christmas for me
Well, at least that’s what I thought
Until there was a knock on the door this morning
Remember this tweet?
Well I’d tried not to stew over it
If you don’t count daily expletive-filled-phone rants
And emails that could probably get me arrested for making threats
“you all need fucking with a pineapple, no lube” <– does that even count as a threat?
I was confident that it HAD to show up somewhere
Even if it was on Ebay
Someone would have a pretty hard time proving that it was their guitar
With a big old picture of MY BOOBS on the back of it
So, for those non-believers
Who doubt the power of the big red man at this time of year
I’m here to testify that…
There really IS a Santa Claus