two minute memories

Magoo loves many, many things in this world

But nothing comes before her animals and two minute noodles

While she gets unlimited time with her pets
We’re a bit more strict on the two minute noodles
She gets those almost never
Being that they are about as nutritious as a maxi pad
Even though they are yum
I loved them as a kid too
The noodles that is
Never actually tasted a maxi pad

So, even though I’m pretty sure this is a load of crapola
I showed it to her
Because I like to see her cry am an arsehole

I’m not joking when I say she had the sads for hours
Even when I said, look, it’s probably not true and you can still have them sometimes

And she was like, “and eat the cancer?!?”

If she’s this dramatic at 8
The teenage her is going to be oh-my-God-fuck-that-I-can’t-even-think-about-it

PS – I keep all her texts. Imma make a funny-as-shit book out of them and sell them to pay for college.
Or therapy.
Probably mostly therapy.

.