anonymity is for arseholes

So, I know this is a comedian’s website and should be full of fart jokes and the like, but I’d just like to take a little pause from the funny today and say,


I read this article yesterday about how an Australian media personality, Charlotte Dawson, stuck up for a lady (Casey) on Twitter, who had been taunted by one of her (Charlotte’s) followers.

After Casey tweeted that she had lost her fiancé to suicide, someone else tweeted “…if I was your fiance I’d hang myself too #gohangyourself.”
Charlottle managed to track down the author of the offending tweet. Reported her to her boss (she’s a mentor [the fuck?] at Monash University) and her boss subsequently suspended her arse.

The next 24 hours saw a barrage of support for Charlotte, of people applauding her and thanking her for her stand against bullying.
Those hours also saw a frighteningly massive number of attacks on her.

To quote the Daily Telegraph Online

Many Twitter users set up fake accounts just for the purpose of joining the campaign against Ms Dawson.

One user set up an account with the handle ‘@gohangyourself’.

The user tweeted:

“@MsCharlotteD Like previously stated by the many tweets you’ve received (sic) … And also stated by the country of New Zealand. Go hang yourself.”

Another user set up an account called “@JoKillYourself” and tweeted:

“@MsCharlotteD Kill yourself and save us the trouble of getting you taken off the air, you worthless w***e.”:

The user also posted instructions on how to do it.

And today it’s been reported that Charlotte was admitted to hospital last night. There are no specifics as to why. But I think it’s fair to assume that the personal and vicious attacks on her are absolutely what put her there.

Look, I get my fair share of ‘fuck you’ mail.
I’d like to be able to say that I can’t remember any of it. But I can. Most of it word for word.
I’ll never understand someone’s need to tear someone else down if they don’t like or agree with them.
I mean, I’m the first to call our Prime Minister a mole. I don’t like her. I think she’s fucking things up royally for Australia and Australians. Would I attack her personally? No I would not. My beef is with her and her policies.
Would I write a song about her? Absolutely. Is it vicious and hateful? My intent is to always find the funny. Some people may not find it funny. But they’ll never find it hateful.

It’s like other stuff I don’t like, smug newsreaders that piss me off with their wanky-ness or singers that have that really nasally tone that makes my ears pop in the ‘not good’ way, or Republican women’s HAIR ohgoddontgetmestarted.
There’s a metric tonne of shit that frustrates the fuck out of me for some reason or other. Sometimes for no good reason at all.
But here’s the thing, I’m free to just NOT LIKE IT.
Walk away, not buy what they’re selling, log of their website, whatever.
I don’t have to hate them. I don’t have to threaten them online.
And I certainly don’t have to tell them to hang themselves and attach instructions on how to get the job done.

The anonymity of the internet is a double edged sword. It allows people to browse around, leave comments on different blogs and websites and generally just find their ‘happy’ online.
The downside, is that same anonymity of the internet brings out the trolls. The faceless tough guys that leave hurtful and horrible messages all over the place.
Well I have a theory along the lines of them needing to get laid and out of their grandma’s spare room, and the internet provides them with the only place they’ll get a hard on a place where they feel important, funny, or noticed.
They really don’t care what they do or say to obtain those things.
In the real world, these people are more than a little fucked in the head.
Why so hateful?
Why the need to type out your venom to someone you’ve (more than likely) never met?
My bet is you could NEVER say those things to someone’s face.
Because cowards are like that.
Is it any wonder that kids are growing up online and are acting out these same behaviors.
Bullying is not OK.
And no one should ever have to go through the pain of losing someone to suicide.

So, to all you little snivelling pussies who use their keyboard as their battle shield, (who wouldn’t be reading this, because the peeps that read this blog, for the most part, are fucking awesome – so feel free to share this page with any bullying fucktards you may know and love) guess what fuckers?
Whether you like it or not, there’s more of US than you.
People who have lives, and don’t need the live on the internet to feel like we’re somebody.
People who will call you out for being the sad humans that you are.

You may not be accountable yet. But you will be.
I hope this whole Charlotte Dawson saga is the catalyst for some change
New laws, tougher laws. Some kind of price to pay for being an arsehole
We could call it a FUCKTARD FEE, a TOSSER TAX. Of just the PRICE of being a PRICK.

My Mum always said, “…being nice doesn’t cost a thing”
And Dad said, “…sticks and stones won’t break my bones,
but fuck you, you fucking fuck.”

So I say, “…being nice doesn’t cost a thing
you fucking fuck.”

UPDATE: more than a few people who’ve read this have pointed out my comment, “…I’m the first to call our Prime Minister a mole” – and that it does, in itself, count as a personal attack
Mole is a word I use a lot. My friends and I will call each other ‘a silly mole, and old mole, drunk mole, grumpy mole’. I guess if certain words have (as Dad says) ‘value points’, I would give the word ‘mole’ maybe a 2 out of 10. Other people may rate it higher, if it’s more offensive to them.
Would I call her a silly mole to her face? She is, after all, the Prime Minister. She is not however, my friend.  So probably not.  Was it a personal attack?
Should I have worded it differently?


      1. i wish my 3 boys this courage against bullying and every other human being on this earth the courage to overcome bullying and the pain it causes. We stand united and united as one we will win xx

  1. Thanks for sharing that Jen! I can’t believe how many people just love to make other people’s lives a living hell! Have they never heard of this quote ” if you can’t say something nice then don’t say it at all” ! I know 2 people that are fairly close to me who think the worse of you and what they have to say is so wrong and I don’t think they know how much it hurts me or how it could hurt you! I absolutely love what you do and care about you! Its ok for people to have opinions but I just wish they would keep it to themselves! Xx

  2. i absolutly agree with you Jenny. that is so much shit to put on a person. i love that charlotte put herself out there for the underdog. these morons who replied , need to clean their act up, get off the weed and get a job…. am i right in seeing jay leno as a hate poster? if so, shame on him .. .. i wonder how these fucktards would feel if it were their sister whao was on the receiving end of this bullshit.. well done for this rant, and putting it out there xx

  3. Jenny,
    I couldn’t agree more, you nailed it. These guys that post this shit are nothing but cowards and deserve all the shit that comes there way.
    Looking forward to see how you get this into your act when you start the UK tour.
    Keep up the good work.

  4. Well done. These wankers are just up set that you and others are sucessful and work bloody hard making personal sacrifices to keep us entertained. You miss the girls growing up and time with your husband to go on tour and earn a honest $ to entertain us. If you don’t like something you do or your shows the solution is very simple…. Don’t go. These wankers need to get a life.
    These are more people supporting what you and your father do than don’t support you. We only know what you want us to know. I know your father has supported many charities over the years and I am sure he would have had your support. We know you have done shows for our troops. More power to you for that. If you need to run somebody down, try Mango Moot Julia. She needs to have shit dumped on her. (only problem is there is not enough to go around, shit that is)
    Ignore them. Keep those fart jokes and boob songs coming. If there were more people doing what you do maybe we would not be in the mess we are. Laughter cures alot of things.
    Luv ya guts!!!
    P.S. Hurry up and get back to Sydney!!!

    1. I think if enough people say no, and just ‘be nicer’ it’ll eventually happen. In the meantime though, I’m happy to shame the fuckers. Spread the word!

      1. Haha gotta name and shame em! Internet seems to be a place of evil somedays, but I completely agree, if everyone was jus a lil bit nicer, it would be a much better world 🙂

  5. Beautifully written, Jenny, and straight from the heart. With that sort of passion and command of the Australian language, have you ever thought of being her speech writer?

  6. People are awful, and when they think they can get away with it, they take ‘awful’ to a whole new level. These are bullies, plain and simple. Bullies should be punished.

  7. You are my hero, babe… the whole saga makes me sick. Cause you and I both know the internet is an awesome playground, eh?

      1. Not sure that’s possible, but something everyone could aspire to perhaps? 😉 Seriously – I’m not an angry person but these kind of people make me freaking furious.

  8. Via my website I receive ‘delightful’ messages from animal rights extremists every now and then (unfortunately). There’s a pattern: usually ‘free’ email accounts (less traceable), false address information (how clever, entering a row of random letters, like a toddler let loose on a keyboard), usually no surname given or just pseudonym. And, these messages are always, without exception, vitriolic rants. Hilarious really, because they usually shout on about equality, amongst other things….! How about equality in communication (i.e. both parties know exactly who the other is and where they live). Otherwise, they should shut up until they grow a spine.

      1. Go Charlotte – how brilliant, locating the bully and her workplace.
        If this happened more often the cowards would disappear from the internet like fog in summer. If the names, addresses & occupation/workplace of these bullies was published…imagine! How great would that be! I file the IP addresses of the abusers that contact me via my website, in case it’s required for future reference.

      2. Seems so over the top, but it might just be what’s needed. I’m pretty sure the attacks would tone down A LOT if the authors knew their identity could be traced.

    1. Like Fiona I too have been on the receiving end of disgusting comments from those “compassionate” animal rights activists. One that will always stick in my mind and rocked me to the core was “I hope that one day you will see your children bash their heads against a cement floor while their throats are slashed several times with a blunt knife”. Makes me want to vomit, cry and say lots of swear words. Among other things such as they hope I rot in hell after dying a long painful death yada yada yada. Has it stopped me from sharing positive stories to combat their shit? Feck no.

      1. oh I forgot to say, well written! These people are cowards and bet most wouldn’t have the balls to say this stuff in public. And best wishes to Charlotte

      2. It’s important that we all have different opinions, but it’s equally important we learn to respect each other’s. Have a conversation, not a one way abuse-fest, led by a person who’s only as tough as they type. x

    1. In fairness, I can see how it’s looked on that way Steve.
      Mole is a term that I use a lot with my friends, Old mole, stupid mole, grumpy mole. As the Prime Minister isn’t one of my friends, it’s probably not appropriate.
      However, there’s not a shred or hatred behind the word when I use it – simply not my intention.
      Telling someone to ‘go hang themselves’….well, that’s really another league isn’t it?

  9. This is dead right Jen….I use faceplant to promote and sell our fabulous bits of Australia(sapphires) and I am on a number of local boards… MY PET PEEVE is assholes who use fake names and hide behind pics that arent of themselves…Recently I have been having a joke about a coupla things, like,for instance a hooker getting thrown out of a local motel hers…the usual shit about stories n jokes u hear when moving to mining towns…OMO and FAB packets n housewives turning trix when hubby is at work..WELL I wouldve been better received stating I was the ANTI CHRIST… THEN! U get these other morons thinking its ok to pick on someone who is different…now I been around the block a time or two…..christ I even worked as a titty girl for ya Dads show back in the dinosaur days….so I figured myself pretty open minded….BUT FARK ME IF THESE BITCHES DONT USE LANGUAGE THAT WOULD CURL YA POPS TOES(NOW THAT IS SAYING SOMETHING) Yet they aint gutzy enough to do it from profles that have pics of themselves…MY POINT? IF YOU HAVE THE STRENGTH OF CONVICTION TO POST OR COMMENT NASTY CRAP…THEN HAVE THE STRENGTH TO DO IT WITH YOUR NAME AND A PIC OF YASELF….YA FUKTARDS….IT IS NEVER OK TO PICK ON PEOPLE OR BULLY AND BACK WHERE I COME FROM(WEST AUS) IF U CAN SAY IT NASTY THEN B PREPARED TO COP A PUNCH IN THE FACE OR ENDURE THE GOOD OLD KALGOORLIE BITCH HOLD….For those of you NOT sure of what a kalgoorlie bitch hold is….its when you r down the pub havin a coldy after work and ya irate Mrs comes in and starts on ya in front of ya mates…you grab her(in a loving embrace hehe) take her down (gently) to the floor…pop ya stool over her head with the cross strut across her neck plonk ya bum back onya stool and quietly finish ya beer….of course the aftermath is pretty messy and alot of hubbies probably learnt the art of the long distance sprint from this…..and it wasnt always used on the wives….BUT I THINK U GET MY POINT.

  10. Ps Jenny…I saw a wicked post on bullying the other day..STOP BULLYING! IT STARTS WITH YOU AT HOME! …..Which is true many people take it out on the schools here but it really is our responsibility as parents to teach our kids at home about do’s n don’ts….love ya gutz missy…keep up ya awesome work

  11. Jen you are a LEGEND! So true and a great read 🙂 There is no need for this sort of crap to happen. The world has enough issues without us going around beating and abusing and bullying each other. We have but one life and it seems weird that people would rather spend it attacking others rather than looking after their own lives and their problems. Guess it makes them feel better taking their issues out on others.

  12. good on ya jen, bloody keyboard warriors, i defended a young boy just recently on f/b, being verbally attacked by a few women 20 odd years older than him, he had voiced his veiws on a subject on a public page, (which i thought were reasonable) and next thing i see he is being percecuted, and told to just kill himself, wtf! !!! Not on my fkn shift it aint happening, i ended up making these nasty bitches so fustrated that there only retaliation was to correct my spelling, lmfao, then they deleted their thread, yay a win for the victim, bullys suck, and 100%respect from me whoever calls them out. ………love and peace all the way 🙂

  13. Well said Jenny. Unfortunately I probably work with wankers like that judging by the conversations in the canteen.
    Hope to see you in Oct. 😉

  14. Well said Jenny!
    & a big well done to Dawson for sticking up for people in the first place. And for calling her boss! Har har!

  15. Jenny,
    First of all, well done for standing up for what’s right! Seems to me that these days, many celebs only take a “stand” on important issues if it is first brought up by excersised fans; and, of course, if it will increase their popularity AND is not pooh-poohed by their promoters! But I love how you just stand right up and say, “Fuck you, you’re wrong, and so is what you’re doing!” Be nice if a lot more people (not just celebs) would do it. (An aside here, I wonder why people fear being ostracized for for doing the right thing? More to the point, why ARE they penalized for doing good?)

    Second, well, I forgot what I was going to say. But I am very happy to see that you are not only morally upstanding but also have the balls to tell it to the world! There are, sadly, several celebrities I had been fans of over the years who turned out to be morally bankrupt sacks of steaming donket excrement, thus ending my admiration of them. You, happily, are not among them. If you ever end up doing a show on Long Island, look me up, I’d like to buy you a drink! And please don’t change! The world needs more like you!


  16. Jen,

    Firstly, let me congratulate you on your material, always good for a laugh and I love the Fuck It Up Friday songs. The reason I like your humour is that it is not only piss-funny but it is witty and clever too.

    Secondly, I love your stand on bullying and your post is well thought-out and considered. I couldn’t agree more!

    Thirdly, when are you coming to Tasmania next I’d love to catch your show live!

    Cheers big ears!

    1. Tassie!! I’d love to come back Slabs…won’t be this year. Finger’s crossed I’ll be playing all over in 2013. (playing all over….gee THAT doesn’t sound strange)

  17. Well said. There is too much of this bullying shit online these days. I had a problem when myspace was big, I had this women who used to be a friend threaten me, send me photos of tombstones with my name on it, send threatening photos of dead people, all saying I need to commit suicide, knowing that I have had 2 attemps 11 years ago.

    I tried reporting to myspace, I went to court even here, but nothing could be done.. there are no laws governing it. It was horrible.

    I feel bad for Charlotte, if they don’t like her,then don’t subscribe to her twitter etc.

    People hide behind computer screens, and that is far worse in my opinion than being bullied to your face, as they say more online than in person.

    Using the term Moles, is an Aussie thing.. used it many times, it is like calling someone a dag etc.. so no worries there mate..

    Keep up the great work..


    1. Thanks Deb, I’m sorry you had to go through that. But you’re right, people say WAS more online than they’d EVER say to your face. Like I said ANONYMITY IS FOR ARSEHOLES xx

  18. Well done to Charlotte, and to Jenny! I wouldn’t havve heard about this story if not for your blog, and its def’ a message that needs to get out there. Bullying nearnly ruined my senior school life, and people shouldnt be able to get away with it so easily.

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