feelings of inadequacy

Did you have video of your wedding day?

I did

But I have no idea where it ended up and have never seen it

Shit like that will go down when you have 2 weddings in a week

On opposite sides of the globe

Rather than dwell on the sadness of no footage of me doing the conga while double fisting pints of Khalua

When I long for memories of my big day

I watch this video

And pretend that it’s really me & Diamond in this magical, fairy land

Oh the music!

The acting!

The sound effects!

The acting!

The location!

The acting!

The visual effects!

THE fucking ACTING!!

No matter what my REAL wedding video had on it

It could never compare to the fabulousity that these Russian newlyweds have come up with

Their imagination knows no bounds


Can you imagine their home made PORN?


  1. OMFG! THAT is HYSTERICAL!!! I haven’t seen such acting since watching the Traci Lords Bio last night on TV…which I’m sure was comparible to their wedding night… 🙂

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