One of the cool things about traveling is the different foods you get to experience
OK, so experiencing any food, anywhere is completely fine with me
Especially food I didn’t have to cook
I’ll try whatever’s going
Except monkey glands
You hear that South Africa?
While I love your people, culture and amazeballs wild life parks
I refuse to chew on a chimps scrotum
What about that sounds enticing to you?
‘Cause to me, it paints a picture of some whackjob in a chef’s hat – a hundred screaming primates – and a pair of hedge trimmers
Our waiter at one restaurant ASSURED me that it didn’t ‘really’ mean there were ‘actual’ monkey glands in the food
It’s just what the food was called
That’s like serving up chocolate fudge slice
And calling it POO CAKE
Why would you do that?
You should try and ‘woo’ the tourists with your local cuisine
Disguise the grody shit you’re trying to serve up
Monkey gland soup?
Why not just call it, Mendella Meat Ball Soup?
I would totally try that
Cause I’m into soup and politics
Yeah, you really need to work on your menu descriptions
Some of us (ie; me) foreigners are a bit squeamish about the weird stuff
I don’t need to know ALL the deets about what I am about to partake in
‘Cause really, the idea of monkey gland soup makes me gag like a teenager giving her first blow job
Speaking of headjobs
I have a hot date tonight, with my husband Diamond, at a cool new restaurant by our house
Apparently they have fresh Rocky Mountain Oysters on the menu
Which is another yummy sounding dish I’ve never tried
Diamond says that they’re really bull testicles
I told him to shut the fuck up