baby fix

So we finally go to see our friend’s baby that I told you about here

And it was great

Fantastic even

‘Cause he wasn’t remotely cute and my ovaries didn’t start screaming at me AT ALL

I think you guys read my rambling crap blogs enough to know when I’m full of shit

Well that bit about the baby was total horseshit

I mean check him out

And oh-my-God did my biological clock start thundering in my brain

Clang-a-langin’ like a stampeding Malley Bull with cast iron knackers

Which is weird for me

Because before I had kids I used to sleep think that my biological clock was digital

Not a maternal bone in my body

Then I had Miss 5

Then I had a nervous breakdown Miss 4

And now?

Well, I think now I’d love another one

If I’m sober being sensible, I understand that touring and life on the road with a baby will do your fucking head in is not an easy task

In fact, it kind of sucks.

A lot

So there’s that reason

Then there’s the whole ‘Diamond said no fucking way’ thing to think about too

I mean, I’m sure if I got naked nagged and pouted long enough, I might be able to change his mind

So I guess for today he’d be feeling pretty fucking relieved safe being on the other side of the world

Although if you think about it, I guess I could get sperm from anywhere really

But I reckon he might get a bit suss if I came home with a black one