Saw an add in a magazine for ‘Supa-Face 2000’

The latest discovery, in facelift technology

Thought, “I could sure use some of that now”

It’s not that I mind the laugh lines

Or the crows feet around me eyes

It’s these drooping lids and saggy bits

Making me look old and tired

So here I am at the doctors office

Laying face down on the bed

She said, “I have here the Supa-Face 2000

I will now insert the knob in the back of your neck”

“So from now on you won’t be looking like you’ve been

Shagging all night and hung out wet

You can give yourself a facelift

Just turn this knob on the back of you head

It will pull the skin up on your face

Make it a little more tight

Once a month though, no more than that

Don’t want you looking like Frankenstein’s Bride!”

So ‘bout an hour later off I went

With me ‘Supa-Face 2000’ installed

Had a bounce in me step and a dent in my wallet

But I was Queen of the World!

Caught me reflection in the window as I walked past

And thought to myself ‘“oh what the fuck”

Might as well try it out now

Just a little twist for luck

I could feel it working straight away

A little tingle all over me face

Looked at my reflection again

Holy Shit I’m a FUCKING BABE!

This ‘Supa-Face 2000” is a bloody miracle

And it didn’t even hurt

I’m an 11 outta 10 (that’s a 10 that swallows)

The blokes are gonna go berserk!

Time went on and I tried to be strong

But it was hard to resist

With each look in the mirror I couldn’t help myself

Just one more little twist

I went back to the doctor 2 weeks later

For me follow up visit

I told him, “Doc this thing amaaazing

I’m fucking in love with it”

“Only one thing I’ve notice though

I’ve started getting these bags under my eyes

I tried turning the knob

But they just seem to get bigger

Is there anything else I should try?”

“Let me see now…Hmmmm”

“Oh Miss Jenny you didn’t listen

You have given one too many twist

Those are not being bags under your eyes

My dear those are your tits!”

“Oh’ that’d explain the goatie then!”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *