Have you seen some of the “Shit [insert something] Says” videos piling up on YouTube?

I’ve been laughing my arse off at a lot of them

My faves are this one and this one

Then my mate Marty suggested I give it a go so you can blame her for this

It didn’t take me long to figure out who would be saying the ‘shit’ in my vid

And before the bogans of the world get all spewy with me for taking the piss

Remember, I’m from Kalgoorlie

Where bogans were  INVENTED

You’ve probably seen some, if not all of these pics before

They make me laugh EVERY time I see them

Surely they were all taken in the days BEFORE digital cameras

Back when you took a pic, and had no idea how it turned out until you picked it up at the photo shop a week later

Because really, if you’d actually seen this shit with your own eyes first

You’d never SHOW it to anyone, right?

RIGHT?

Someone’s a bit excited about the Besty Wetsy doll Santa might bring her this year

This would have absolutely have been my Christmas card this year, if my husband wasn’t such a kill joy. I’m married to the fun police.

Would you even let a dude that looked like this NEAR your kids…..let alone put them on his lap? Looks like he just got done brawling over a bottle of booze in a bag with the other homeless Santas.

If I had a son, he’d totally be the little shit in this pic

OK, so I’m a little confused here

Maybe some of you can help me out

We currently have more unemployed Australians than we’ve had in over a decade (1 million+ people)

A global economic slowdown has seen Australian’s homes decreasing in value at an accelerated rate

Australians are worried over the newly introduced carbon tax and what it means for them

And they’re  also having to deal with constantly rising household costs that their wages never seem to adjust to

The government has just announced plan to slash billions of dollars in public spending

And I seem to recall that not too long ago, our Prime Minister’s popularity hit a record low approval rating of minus 45%

So can someone tell me how, today, in Australia

Politicians received a MASSIVE – no seriously, FUCKING MASSIVE, pay rise?!?

The fuck?

Julia Gillard will now earn more than the UK Prime Minister and the President of the United States

With a $90,000 pay increase that sees her now taking home almost $470,000 a year

Yep

Even the lowest polly on the totem pole will see his pay packet fatten up with an additional $40,000 per year

And while I realise that this raise was at the suggestion of an independent body, and not at the politicians request

Is there no one with any brains in charge of this shit?

Is this really the right economy to give ANY of those wankers a pay rise?

Can’t they see that people are battling, worried about how to pay their bills

Worried about these new taxes, their jobs, paying their mortgages?

It just screams unfair

And shows just how out of touch and fucking ridiculous the politicians in this country are

It’s like a slap in the face to the people they are supposed to be helping. Isn’t government supposed to work FOR the PEOPLE?

Cause sure as shit, there’s no ‘people’ I know that would approve this bullshit

How about this Christmas, these newly cashed up pollies head down to their local Salvation Army

And donate their recent windfall to the Australians who REALLY need it

That’d be a good place to start

Are there benefits to being a virgin on your wedding day?

And then marrying a virgin?

I wouldn’t know

And neither would you guys, so don’t lie

Looks pretty gross hysterical to me