OK, so I’m a little confused here

Maybe some of you can help me out

We currently have more unemployed Australians than we’ve had in over a decade (1 million+ people)

A global economic slowdown has seen Australian’s homes decreasing in value at an accelerated rate

Australians are worried over the newly introduced carbon tax and what it means for them

And they’re  also having to deal with constantly rising household costs that their wages never seem to adjust to

The government has just announced plan to slash billions of dollars in public spending

And I seem to recall that not too long ago, our Prime Minister’s popularity hit a record low approval rating of minus 45%

So can someone tell me how, today, in Australia

Politicians received a MASSIVE – no seriously, FUCKING MASSIVE, pay rise?!?

The fuck?

Julia Gillard will now earn more than the UK Prime Minister and the President of the United States

With a $90,000 pay increase that sees her now taking home almost $470,000 a year

Yep

Even the lowest polly on the totem pole will see his pay packet fatten up with an additional $40,000 per year

And while I realise that this raise was at the suggestion of an independent body, and not at the politicians request

Is there no one with any brains in charge of this shit?

Is this really the right economy to give ANY of those wankers a pay rise?

Can’t they see that people are battling, worried about how to pay their bills

Worried about these new taxes, their jobs, paying their mortgages?

It just screams unfair

And shows just how out of touch and fucking ridiculous the politicians in this country are

It’s like a slap in the face to the people they are supposed to be helping. Isn’t government supposed to work FOR the PEOPLE?

Cause sure as shit, there’s no ‘people’ I know that would approve this bullshit

How about this Christmas, these newly cashed up pollies head down to their local Salvation Army

And donate their recent windfall to the Australians who REALLY need it

That’d be a good place to start

Last night was the first night’s solo show since getting back from Japan

I’ve been to Collie before, but never played a show there

Add in that it was a Wednesday night

I wasn’t sure if anyone would even show up

I needn’t have worried

Not only did we have a great turnout for a school night

I think I was laughing harder than the audience most of the night

That’s what happens when you play in the country

It’s so top heavy with interesting characters and funny bastards

They end up entertaining ME

Particularly these boys

Who are, unintentionally, now members of the Collie Ranga Flavour Saver Club

They all had goatie beards

That were GINGER as buggery

I tried my best to give them a shot at a normal life

And by ‘normal life’, I mean ripping off the fanta fuzz from their faces

So they could go out in the world without the ridicule and shame of having people laugh at their flame coloured fur

And people knowing they have a concealed weapon in their pants

In the form of a clown wig

Looking forward to getting back to the bush this week

Starting tomorrow (Wed) in COLLIE

(Thurs) JURIEN BAY

(Fri) GERALDTON

(Sat) LANCELIN

I’m betting that I’ll find more than a few additions for my WANKER WALL

Although this fine Sydney specimen – which came with complimentary tummy rolls / belly waves

Is going to take some beating

How about you get some of those arseholes who think they’re heros

Those “thugs” going through Britain in gangs

Burning buildings

Trashing businesses

And ruining lives

Just for the sake of it

How about you ship the little fuckers off to Afghanistan

Show them what their fellow countrymen are sacrificing

For the country some bastards are so intent on destroying

Show them what a real man is