For those of you that have my latest album, or have been to a show recently, you’ll already know this one
The footage is from the UK/Ireland Tour, and if you came to one of those shows, you might even catch a glimpse of yourself somewhere in the clip….supastaaaarrr!!
I reckon this is the the perfect Friday song (and a pretty good song for Mondays too)
You’ve probably had a gutfull of your more ‘wanky’ co workers
And have been biting your tongue all week, and wishing they would go fuck themselves with a pineapple, or at least get a really itchy STD
There’s a cure for that
In the form of this song
ESPECIALLY if they don’t know what F.O.C.U.S. means yet
So crank it up loud, and get the office singing along
And Monday, I’ll be doing a special F.O.C.U.S. giveaway!
Disclaimer: I realise that it’s not really Friday ANYWHERE anymore (except maybe here in the U.S.) please direct all complaints to YOUTUBE – who I had to convince that this was MY song, I wrote it blah blah copyright Nazis. Hence the reason it’s being posted on a Saturday for most of you. On a related note, I need more wine and Imma send YouTube the bill and a FOCUS sticker.
You guys, this being on tour business is making me even suckier than usual at keeping you updated. So, let’s just have a hug, and throw around some forgiveness.
Which is WAY better than the, ‘where are the photos and updates from the fucking tour JENNY?’, that my Nanna’s been emailing me
Well the first week was huge.
Don’t forget, you can FOLLOW ME ON FACEBOOK - because when I go MIA here, you can be sure I’ll show up there.
Now, from memory (which is a joke on a good day) this has been the biggest start to a Sydney tour ever
The first week, entirely sold out
And I’m writing this backstage from Castle Hill, the first show of the second week – which is also packed to the rafters
Here’s some of my fave pics from week one
Bless Mum’s heart, she is the best merch bitch in the business
But she’s still getting the hang of the big girl camera
But sometimes, blurry is best
We all look younger and a bit more lovely
So, don’t go changin’ Mum!
As always, one of the best parts of touring, is the characters you get to meet
The funny ones, the tall ones
And the ones who, even after I have SAT ON THEIR LAP to sing them the BASTARD SONG
Still come back for more
And by more, I mean, sit on the edge of the stage to have Dad serenade them
Balls of are you fucking high, dude? steel, right there.
There’s the usual assortment of bald heads Bellies
Crazy mofos And even some straight up normal people (but we don’t see those too often) It all adds up to the perfect combo of holy shit and fuck yeah
But night after night, we meet some of the best people around
In the form of venue security
These guys (and girls) have a big task
They keep the crazy to a minimum
And they work really hard to keep the peace, and provide protection from the fucktards Especially when the fucktards are DAD & I
We can be quite the shit stirrers
And we’re OFF!
It’s doesn’t get any better than starting a tour off with a week’s worth of SOLD OUT shows, so yeah….so far, so fucking awesomely good!
I got to break in my brand new guitar (sooo good) AND my new wavy curling iron gadget that I decided to try out on this trip
‘Cause who doesn’t love 80′s hair?
You guys probably recognise Glenn
We see him every time we come to Sydney
It’s always great to see familiar faces, and I loved that he came out for the first night of the tour in Hexham Turns out, it doesn’t matter what I do with my hair….I will always end up looking like a drowned rat after my set
In the words of Magoo, “You sure sweat a lot for a girl Mum, but at least you don’t smell”
And Macaroni, “Those people must REALLY like you if they put their arms around you for a photo when you’re all wet and gross”
But if it bothered the peeps in Hexham, they were nice enough to not say anything
Even if they WERE thinking it
There’s no such thing as a bad time in Hexham, and they proved that again on Tuesday night. Love that place.
Now in Charlestown….they like it loud
It may have been a Wednesday night show – but this crew were partying like it was a weekend. A long weekend
Tonnes of awesome characters, who weren’t adverse to showing some skin Lots of boobs for Dad to sign. His TIT CAM is already getting a work out on this tour. There’ll no doubt be a lot of new additions to the GALLERY by the end of this first week
Me? I’m seeing my fair share of ball heads and bellies too
Because while DAD may be prepare to sign the girl’s bits, I’m a fan of all the boys keeping their pants ON
Plus there’s not a marker out there small enough to sign some of the junk that’s been flashed at me over the years
PLUS plus, I’m a one-penis kinda gal.
HI DIAMOND! Imma try to post every day while we’re out here on the road
Bring you guys along on this crazy few weeks
I mean, maybe it won’t ALL be crazy….maybe it’s just this first week
But I doubt it.