Stick a fork in us
We are done!
I should probably say, stick a CORK in us, as our show there….the FINAL show of the WHOLE TOUR was in the fabulous city of CORK, here in Ireland
At the beautiful Cork Opera House
The venue for operas, all sorts of fancy schmancy shows
Even the backstage mirror is all ornate-y
No, this doesn’t mean 4 = 1 = 5
It’s 4, 1
Not the 411
As in, show number forty one!
And what a pearler is was
A room full of people that laughed loud and often
A crowd that gave us WAY more than we gave them Including the Blues Brothers
Is that like a hint for me to get my arse back home to Chicago?
This is here is the face of two happy kids
A bit tired
But so happy
And as a sure-fire sign that the tour is indeed over
My gig clothes have been binned
And before you say anything about the starving kids in Africa that I should have donated my tranny wardrobe to
I have been wearing this stuff forever. Like, EVERY night on this tour
It’s worn out. There’s holes in it
The bling has all fallen off
And it smells suspiciously like farts and donuts
It’s all probably still in the bin backstage if you REALLY want it
Don’t panic too much though. I kept the shoes
What do you think I am, a monster??
Hey Cork, big sloppy kisses and cuddles to all of you
It’s been a while…we missed you.
We missed the big ol’ auditorium we play in here
And how when it fills up, it feels like a rock concert
All stadium-y ‘n shit
Rock out with your cock out!
Or, in my case, if you don’t have
a penis one…… maybe with just your red lippy and guitar on?
I’d finished my set and signing
And was backstage
cracking open a bottle of red taking off my FMFM shoes
When Mum sent me this text
I thought, well, I’m not surprised, they’ve always been crazy about Dad in this part of the world
And then I thought, hmmm….must be nearly time to go home if Mum is starting to say ‘fuck’.
Thank you Stevenage.
For a wild show
And giving Dad the goodbye he deserves
Me…you can’t get rid of so easily.
See you next year! x
When we play in Kettering, we stay in Northampton, which is the best
Mum & Dad had a house here for years, so it feels like home whenever we’re in this part of the country
Our favourite restaurant is here too, so we’re happy to be heading there tonight on our night off. And if you’re wondering what that smell is, that’s what trouble smells like.
And the show last night will go down as one of my faves. The audience was the perfect combination of ‘loud’ and ‘listening’
Admittedly, it’s easy to do a high energy show when you’re hopped up on birthday cake
Mum made me promise not to tell anyone it was her birthday
So I got everyone to sing HAPPY BIRTHDAY to her when I was out signing at intermission
Then, when Dad was on stage dedicating a song to her (“Better Get Betty Home”) I raced out the front to where she was and grabbed her, “…Quick mum! You’ve got to get in here!”
I took her by the arm and dragged her into the theatre, and she was proper shitting herself. “Did your Dad fall of the stage or something…what’s happened?!?”
Before she realised where I was taking her, I delivered her to Dad, on stage and the whole fabulous crowd sang a rousing rendition on HAPPY BIRTHDAY to her
As Dad said, in 30 years of doing this, that’s only the second time she has ever been on stage with him (once before was in Ireland years ago….I think there may have been drinking and a dare involved in that incident)
You guys rocked it Kettering