Sold out, amazing crowds

We also got to catch up with some great mates

You remember Tom?

If you’re not  familiar with his story

You can read about him here

Before his wife Kylie passed away

She had been promising to take her younger brother to one of our shows

But he had to wait until he turned 18

Kirrin, who looks so much like Kylie, turned 18 just before his big sister died

So he never got the chance to see a show with her

But Tom made sure his little brother-in-law didn’t miss out

The boys had special t-shirts (dedicated to Kylie) made up just for the night

Instead of coming with a big group of mates

They opted to just come to the show together

And brought along photos from every time we’d all caught up in the past

There were some laughs and a few tears

Dad and I made sure we did Kylie’s favourite songs in the show

‘Cause we know she was there somewhere

x

Fiona now lives here in New Zealand and runs a very successful novelty cookies & cake company

She made these hip Simpson cookies on a stick, for Macaroni & Magoo

That I’m not sure if I’m allowed to take these back into the U.S.

So I should probably eat them, just to be on the safe side

She also brought this with her

A cake of ME – that she made from scratch, less than an hour before she came to meet me

I’m like, dude – that shit would take me all day to make

WITH a packet mix

4 glasses of wine

And it STILL wouldn’t be edible

She said the chocolate cake filling is low fat

But the icing will get you a year stint at Jenny Craig

Bet you’ll never guess what I’m having for brekky?

If you live in the Tauranga area,  and you like delicious homemade yummies – go to Funky Cookies & Cakes

(She also couriers her fabbo treats anywhere in the North Island of NZ)

That I totally forgot to post about at the time

Which should come as no surprise to anyone who knows me

And knows how much I do not have my shit together

Anyhoo

Better later than never, right?

So back when it was my birthday on the Victorian tour

We started of the day with wonderful family friends

Wally & Rosemary

Who, for as long as I can remember, we have called

Miss Rosemary and Sir Walter Fat-fuck

I’m pretty sure Dad probably gave them their nick-names

(that’s them, in the back of this pic)

They were having a bit of a shindig at their house and invited us to come along

And what an amazing home they have

An outdoor grill that would make Diamond sulk for a year

Something that really made the day special for us

Was Dad getting to catch up with, and me getting to meet for the first time

Gerry

A friend of Dad’s for many, many years now

You may not recognise him from the photos but I’m pretty sure most of you would be familiar with his work (we’ll get to that later)

He’s a top bloke of the highest order

And his wife Pauline

Well, I’m pretty sure I’ve never met a more genuine, kind and fun lady

Love at first site for me

She was just brilliant

They even invited me to stay at their house whenever I am in the UK

Which might help if they actually adopted me my cause next time

.

Of course we got the guitar out

Just spreading the cultural enrichment….as we do

Some of the folks had not heard Dad’s stuff before

And none of them had heard of me at all

Always fun seeing people react to our music for the first time

The lovely Miss Rosemary even prepared a homemade pavlova that doubled as my birthday cake

But seeing I inhaled it before any pics were taken

Here’s what I would call my 2nd cake

The CAM-CAKE

A big ol’ door stopper sized slab of Camembert cheese

Yeah baby!

So indeed yes, it was a fabbo, FABBO day

I want to end this with some of my favorite songs from Gerry’s history making repertoire

This one gives me goosebumps

Probably his biggest hit (which he sang for us)

And my all-time favourite

Told you he is the shit!

If you don’t, please CLICK HERE to read their story

Because it really is a beautiful story

A love story

About what love is really about

How even though it can be heartbreaking and cruel

True love is always unconditional

If you know Tom & Kylie, you know that’s the kind of love they have

Kylie had surgery recently

Initially she came out of it OK

But then she wasn’t

Kylie was taken off life support on Saturday March 26th

She was 25 years old

“…She was so very, very special
And was so from the start
You held her in your arms
But mainly in your heart

And like a single drop of rain
That on still waters fall,
Her life did ripples make
And touched the lives of all.”

Rest in peace beautiful girl.

x

Seriously, it’s going crazy fast

Just over a week to go

It’s been pretty shit hot so far

Except for the last couple of days

Which have sucked dick

A lot

I don’t want to  go into it too much

Just know it rhymes with U-PAY-TIMMIGRATION!

But this is where you guys come in

Because it’s pretty hard to stay shitty for long

Meeting so many fucking nutters out here

And catching up with old mates too

(Hi carol & James!)

And sooooo many additions to the wanker wall, it’s going to need it’s own bloody website

And then there’s people like Pam (on the left, in the pic below)

I met Pam a few nights ago

And her sense of humour right now

Considering what she is obviously dealing with,  is pretty fucking awesome

Sometimes we need little reminders

That life is good

And little problems, when you look at the big picture

Amount to fuck all really

So yeah they might never let me back into the UK and I’m going to be fucking spewing the little voice inside my head I like to call, perspective

Is telling me to suck it up biatch!

A great friend of Dad’s did Diamond & I the honor of presiding over our Aussie wedding ceremony

It was our second wedding as we’d done it a few days earlier in Chicago

Round two

We were old pros at this stage

But it was his first time

See Greg, Dad’s friend, had gone & gotten himself ordained online

JUST so he could be the officiant at our wedding

To make sure it worked, Dad & I went and got ourselves ordained too

(Keep us in mind if you want a  wedding, funeral or christening to be fucked up fun & different!)

Anyhoo

It was Greg’s first time

And our first time meeting him

For those of you that don’t know Greg

He is Greg Evans, of the hugely popular Australian TV show Perfect Match from the 80′s & 90′s

Diamond & I had no idea he was performing our ceremony

Dad had wanted it to be a suprise

And Diamond & I had no clue what was up until the theme music from Perfect Match started playing

And we met Greg for the first time

The best way to describe it?

Fucking funny

But not just that

It was really special

Can you have a romantic moment, that’s also hilarious?

I think we did

Greg did such an awesome job on our big day

That now days, along with his radio gig on 3MP in Melbourne

He’s also highly sought after to preside over people’s wedding ceremonies

How cool is that?

And even cooler?

We got to catch up with Greg tonight at the show in Mooroopna

He’s a very special man

That now gets to be a big part of so many people’s special day

Perfect match indeed.

Do something a bit different at our Colac show?

Yeah, well that didn’t happen

See, there was a mix up with advertising for tonights show

We were initially booked to play at a different venue here in Colac

Then that venue got closed for renovations

So the show got re-booked at a different venue

Ticketmaster, being as ‘on the ball’ as they are NOT

Didn’t change the venue listing on the website

They just showed the Colac show as cancelled

Yup, CANCELLED

Pretty hard to sell tickets for a show people think isn’t going ahead

Anyhoo, a few people

And I mean a FEW, were able to buy tickets anyway from the venue

Once we found out that almost no tickets were sold for the show

They told us to cancel it

Dad said, fuck it, we could make this fun

We came down to the venue this afternoon

With plans to set up for a little mini-concert

In the ’round

Backstage

With beer

Turns out the complex where the gig is also houses cinemas

So their management wasn’t keen on us playing in an area that wasn’t ‘zoned’ for a show

And then…

Then people started buying tickets

Too many for us to go ahead with our planned KEV & JENNY UNPLUGGED gig

So yeah, that kinda sucks

But for those that were at the ‘regular’ show tonight

You guys were very cool

And we had fun anyway – as we always do

But I wanted you guys to know that the thought was there

That’s what counts, right?

The plus side?

POPCORN!!

And pulled out some of my faves

There’s lots of my mates here

Friends I was lucky enough to catch up with out on the road in 2010

The live shots at the end are taken by my mate Tam at Takeyapick Photography

It was a busy year

A pretty fucking cool year too

Looking through all of them made me smile big

JENNY TALIA 2010 a year on the road… from Jenny Talia on Vimeo.

And reminded me just how FUCKING BIG that smile of mine actually is

* backing song by some random chick called TJ Dennis?

How’s it?

Yeah-yeah, I realize half of you are just going to scroll straight down to the dick pic

Go ahead

The rest of us (ie; those who love me not just for my penes) will carry on, shall we?

So last night’s show was awesome!

Sold out in Woy Woy

We got to meet a gorgeous little fan before the show

Shauna

Signed her guitar for her

And while Dad *pretended* to go find her one of his guitar picks

The rest of the crew, one at a time

Would sneak up to her and say, “….psstt…here’s one of Kev’s picks, but don’t tell him I gave it to you..!“

Poor kid was so torn

Excited to be getting some of Dad’s personal cool looking new picks

But struggling with the fact that she thought we were stealing them to give to her

She was putting them inside her pants

Until she gave herself such a wedgie

And her face was bright red with guilt

That she ‘fessed up and tried to give them back to Dad

But once we let her know we were just playing silly buggers and it was Dad who started it

She had the biggest giggle about it

Such a cutie

…..

In other news

Which some of you no doubt already know about

So yeah, 2 girls stole our stuff from backstage

While we were all in the foyer after the show signing cds & saying G’day to everyone

They’ve been identified, they were captured by 4 different security cameras at the venue

Geniuses as well as thieves, weren’t they?

I actually remember meeting them earlier in the night

And I’m not even joking when I tell you,

If their vajay-jays were as big as their mouths

Their guts would have dropped out

I mean that in the nicest possible way

Of course

We could stay angry about it

But at the end of the day, I’m not going to get 2 skanky hoes ruin what was, up until that point, one of the best nights of the entire tour

Woy Woy is a beautiful place, and the fans there were so brilliant to us

A lot of your responses to my Twitter & Facebook posts about it mentioned karma

And I reckon your right

What goes around comes around

But my fave message was “….may the fleas of a thousand camels infest their crotches, and their arms be too short to scratch them”

Gold

I’m hoping to get a copy of the security tape so I can include their lovely mugs on my video blog for this tour

Wouldn’t that be fucking AWESOME?

……..

Let’s go to our happy place shall we?

Well, not REALLY our happy place

More like the place that makes us gag a little

And feel superior in our normalcy

‘Cause we’re ALL SO NORMAL AREN’T WE?

Bwahahaha

You remember our little SLICED UP SLUGGY FRIEND

(oh yeah, don’t click on the above link if you are at work, eating, or prone to nightmares)

From a few weeks ago?

Good news you guys…

I found his DAD!!

Now I just need to find his Mum

And his sister

Maybe there’s some cousins out there somewhere too…

In September last year, I posted this:

We get to meet some amazing people out here on the road

Everyday, there’s at least one person who stays with you

In your thoughts, I mean

Over the years, we have met some incredible people with some equally incredible stories

I wanted to tell you about a kid Dad met years ago

I remember Dad coming home from one of his first tours in the 80′s

He told me all about a 10 year old kid he met.

He’d received a letter from this boy’s family, asking if Dad could maybe meet with him when he was doing a show in their town

His name was Tom

Tom was a huge fan

Tom had Cystic Fibrosis

His prognosis was, in Dad’s words, devastating

Tom was living in a remote outback town in Australia called Coober Pedy. It’s in South Australia, and is often referred to as the opal capital of the world

So the day that Dad met Tom was a great one

They hung out together

Dad took him in their plane for a ride

Took him to the soundcheck and let him check out how all the equipment works at the shows

Tom loved it

I know Dad was blown away by this little kid

Such a personality, with an amazing attitude to life and his illness

Long after Dad said goodbye to Tom, he was deeply affected by his story

Sometimes life is just bullshit isn’t it?

There was nothing fair about what was happening to Tom

Dad never heard anything from, or about Tom after that

But he never forgot

Some 15 years later, a guy cam up to Dad at a show in Sydney

Do you remember years ago when you met a sick kid in Coober Pedy?

Dad told him he did

Well, do you remember signing your Los Angeles Angels baseball cap for him?

Dad said, yeah, of course he remembered

Well I still have that hat

It was Tom

And didn’t that just bring us all undone?

So here’s Tom, who was never expected to make it, all these years later

With his beautiful fiance Kylie

Tom is getting married next year

Who says there are no happy endings?

*****************************

HERE’S THE UPDATE:

Tom & Kylie got married last month!

And they came to the show last night in Orange

Tom is in pretty much perfect health these days

Kylie has just had major surgery on her leg

And has to wait to have one more operation to hopefully have her leg be A-OK again

Once that’s sorted, she can go back on the list

To wait for a kidney donor

She told me the wait, on average, can take anywhere between 4 & 8 years

Yeah, that’s YEARS

I hope it happens for her so much sooner than that

Kylie has already been through one kidney transplant (donated from her Mum)

That ultimately didn’t work out

Kylie said all she really wants is to have her life back again

I can’t imagine the strain that something like this puts on a relationship

Kylie said that Tom has been amazing through it all

From making sure she’s eating right

To carrying her when she’s having trouble walking

Better or worse

That’s what it’s all about isn’t it?

I told Kylie that they are getting their ‘worse’ out of the way while they’re still newlyweds

So that the rest of their lives can be spent enjoying the ‘better’

No one deserves it more

x

Are you an organ donor?

In the UK http://www.organdonation.nhs.uk/ukt/default.jsp
Australia http://www.donatelife.gov.au/
USA http://organdonor.gov/

GO DO IT!!