#campthrowback

Over the weekend I traveled to Ohio to do a show
My friend Brittany was hosting a camp, Camp Throwback
The memo we all got before camp was, “Wouldn’t it be great to re-experience all the camp moments you loved as a kid, now that you’re legally allowed to drink and and light things on fire? Oh wait, you totally can”

I went to camp with my USBFF Kerru. She’s like a taller, brunette version of me….only with a Chicago accent and more swear words. I know, you didn’t even think that was possible, right?

Camp started on Thursday, but we couldn’t leave until Friday night, which had us arriving at 4:30am Saturday. We woke Brittany up when we got there, because we’re lovely like that, and she pointed out where our cabin was. There were already 7 other girls in their sleeping. And they’d just had a 90’s party that night, so I was pretty sure those girl sleeping were drunk off their arses and snoring to beat the band, while wearing flannels over their Nirvana shirts
I was like, dude, if I was hammered and two strangers walked into my cabin, things might get ugly.
So we stood outside the cabin for 10 minutes debating whether or not to go in.
Then decided that heading back to the minivan and pouring a wine would make our decision easier
Two hours later, WE were hammered, the sun was up and we weaved our way back to the cabin, just as our roommates were waking up.
HimynameisJennyandthisisKerrunicetomeetyoudoyouhaveanyburritos?!
*thud*
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Field day was on the Saturday, and Kerru and I were totally ready to participate in it and get our trophy on
Until we got dressed in our sporty-spice clothes with our headbands and knee-high socks on and used up all our energy.
So we kinda supervised the field day in between naps
Although I spent most of the day killing spiders and bugs because Kerru is a totally pussy completely terrified of any creepy crawly (and her subsequent spazz attacks whenever she spotted something crawling in the cabin could win her a spot on the fucktard version of  ‘so you think you can dance’) and also changing my undies twice from laughing at her.
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I made new friends, learnt to shower with thongs on (flip flops) and roll up a sleeping bag, climb a tree and hunt beer
OK, one of those is not true.
It was a crazy 30 hours and I came away absolutely knackered.
The 120+ others had been there since Thursday, so I’m pretty sure most of them would have spent Monday feeling like they were recovering from autopsies.campthrowback4

The show was hilarious. I mean I was kinda funny, but the real funny came from playing to people that haven’t heard my stuff before
Obviously I always play to some people that don’t know my stuff – but playing to a group where nobody has heard me before? Hilarious!
I love seeing people’s faces hearing my songs for the first time.
I don’t think anyone laughed more than me
The weird part of the show?
Not wearing mystripper heels
I felt naked I tell ya.
But they were a great mob, and better than cool to hang out with after the show
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FACT: if you get enough crazy-fun people in one space at a time, add in awesome activities (think watermelon eating contest, Bloody Mary’s for breakfast and drunk dodgeball) alcohol and bunk beds, it’s going to be shit-storm of fun.
Add to that some Jenny Talia, ’cause every camping trip needs a classy sheila – and you’ve got the recipe for a camping success

They’ve already announced Camp Throwback 2015
My liver said I can go, but it’s staying home.

 

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cheers chi-town!

The Chicago show was last night
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It was over in a blur
After a huge-crazy few days leading up to it
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And I was so excited to tell you guys all about it once it was done
But
I have no photos
Me
The person never without a camera
The girl that took over 18,000 photos last year
Yep
None of last night
Yeah, I don’t know how that happened either
So I borrowed a couple from people’s Facebook pages (Hi Tiff!)
Add in the couple of lamo selfies from backstage before the show started
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(I would make an excellent bobble head doll – the hooker series)

Where I had butterflies that felt more like fighter-jets doing kamikaze drills in my belly
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(so excited I think I need to change my undies….wait, did I WEAR undies?)

It was completely sold out, to the point that we had to move to a larger roomIMG_0560
People came in from all overIMG_0567
(crazy Tracey all the way from Kentucky)

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There’s nothing quite like a packed house full of people that had NEVER seen me live before
And a large chunk of them, until last night, only know me as Macaroni & Magoo’s MumIMG_0563
I’m not sure what they were expecting
To be honest, I wasn’t too sure what to expect either

I do know that I haven’t had that much fun at a show in forever1506120_10202920657321940_1888432399_oExpectations….exceeded by a bazillion
Result – officially blown away

Thank you x

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WHO DARES GRINS….FOR CHRISTMAS!

Now if you, like me….LOVE THE SHIT OUT OF CHRISTMAS!

Or if you are a miserable Grinchy bastard someone that’s not a fan

I’m about to help you out

Fuck off Jen, I hear you say

It’s OCTOBER for shit’s sake

I KNOW you guys, and normally I’d be with you

But in oder for ME to help YOU, we need to GET. ON. THIS!

And by GET ON THIS, I mean sometimes the post office sucks hairy ones and can take more than a month to get stuff from me to you when it really shouldn’t take that long in 2013. Also where the fuck are the flying cars they promised us?
Apparently once they start uttering the “C” word….”Christmas”….everything sent from that moment on is strapped on the back of a blind, amputee camel, that stops for beer all the way from my place to yours.
So it actually NOT really the post office’s fault
It the crippled alcoholic camels they hire as casuals during silly season
And while I would almost feel bad about putting a camel out of a job, if we’re organised, we won’t even need them!

Soooooo.…for those of you looking for a little JENNY TALIA under your tree or in your stocking this year, (not to be confused with Jenny Talia IN stockings….’cause those things give me an itchin’ in my kitchen that only Monistat can fix) I have some to share

‘Cause while I try so sign my CDS etc whenever I can, online orders are sometimes sent from Australia, the UK or the USA. And depending on where *I* am at the time, I’ll sign ’em if I see ’em

But for THIS Christmas, anyone that orders a copy of my WHO DARES GRINS DVD (filmed live in South Africa) will not only get their DVD personally signed by MOI

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…You’ll also receive a signed WHO DARES GRINS POSTER A-N-D a F.O.C.U.S. sticker for FREE!! FAAAHREE!! Yeah baby!

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All orders for the WHO DARES GRINS DVD received BEFORE 1st DECEMBER will be eligible for this deal

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In preparation, all handjobs in my house are on hold
Sorry Diamond
Wouldn’t want to wear out my writing wrist.

CLICK HERE TO ORDER YOUR COPY OF WHO DARES GRINS ON DVD

CLICK HERE TO ORDER YOUR COPY OF WHO DARES GRINS ON DVD

CLICK HERE TO ORDER YOUR COPY OF WHO DARES GRINS ON DVD

CLICK HERE TO ORDER YOUR COPY OF WHO DARES GRINS ON DVD