Spend too much time at your desk?

Can’t drag yourself away from Twitter?

Don’t want to miss a enemies friend’s status update on Facebook?

Then grab yourself one of these ugly fucking things must have loser pillows cushions for those who like to power nap while they network

Although, it looks a bit masturbate-y to me

Like guys should stick on their lap

And start ratlin’ the sperm bank

Or is that just the way my brain works?

Don’t answer that

Would you use one?

Alternatively, you could just save your money for cheese puffs and beer

And just take your laptop to bed like I do

This video takes me back to my happy place

It’s my first video blog from the last UK tour in 2009

Back when I knew how to use iMovie and thought hey fuck it, why don’t I make a full on live DVD and edit it MY FUCKING SELF with final cut pro like all the professionals use but I would need a newer computer and updated software so I’ll just go spend thousands of dollars on that shit but wait oh hey, I don’t know how to USE this fancy fucking program so I better get me some lessons from the experts in blue shirts at the Apple store who are really helpful which is good because I’ll end up spending more time with them than my fucking husband because I didn’t realise that I shouldn’t edit using USB external hard drives, and every fucktard (except me) knows you can only use firewire hard drives for big arse projects because otherwise you’ll lose months of fucking editing work when your files become corrupt and won’t fucking open anymore and you’re so spewing you could cry except you already ARE crying because you missed out on going to see the Dolly Parton concert that you had VIP tickets for AND you have to get your shit done yesterday ’cause it’s only 46 more god damn mother fucking days ’til Christmas fuck cunt prick shit mother fucker

And how’s YOUR day going?

Or that you have no life children

I know some of you may have already seen this

But I wanted to share

For those of you that haven’t

We’re in the car on the way to Orange

Where the show is tonight

And Mum & I have watched this on the trip

No less than 14 times so far

And every time

We laugh, snort

And pee a little in our pants

Every. Time.

Does this girl even realise just how fucking awesome she is?

I’m totally starting a fan club

Anyone know her name?