I should maybe call this ‘shit’ pic, not hit pic

Cause it’s Macaroni’s turn to have the gastro bug that hit Macaroni & me last week

She’s been a trooper about it though

And by trooper, I mean WAY better at puking than Magoo. Like, no mess anywhere. Nada. Awesomesauce

Which is WAY better than puke-sauce. In pink shag pile carpet. I’m talking to YOU Magoo

Macaroni even survived me not letting her go to school

Yay for iPads, DSs, fishtanks & Kindles

And jigsaw puzzles, that I offered to sit down and help her with but, “…Mum, it’s really a lot easier and faster if you don’t help”

Oh, and yay for me. Who went out in the sub-freezing temps and snow, to meet Macaroni’s teacher and pick up today’s school work for her.

Because I offered to get her anything she wanted today. Chicken soup maybe?

Nope, she chose math & literature

So even without going to school, she sat and did hours of school work

By choice

Not sure where she gets the ‘learn-y’ gene from. But boy, does she have it bad

With me being Captain Pukey McShitmapants last Tuesday, Magoo on Friday and Macaroni starting last night

My calculations tell me that Diamond will be having the *MAN version of said ‘bug’ later this week

Guess I better notify the hospital

*pussy

One dead hamster

Equals one inconsolable six year old

Fuck

R.I.P. Buddy

This video takes me back to my happy place

It’s my first video blog from the last UK tour in 2009

Back when I knew how to use iMovie and thought hey fuck it, why don’t I make a full on live DVD and edit it MY FUCKING SELF with final cut pro like all the professionals use but I would need a newer computer and updated software so I’ll just go spend thousands of dollars on that shit but wait oh hey, I don’t know how to USE this fancy fucking program so I better get me some lessons from the experts in blue shirts at the Apple store who are really helpful which is good because I’ll end up spending more time with them than my fucking husband because I didn’t realise that I shouldn’t edit using USB external hard drives, and every fucktard (except me) knows you can only use firewire hard drives for big arse projects because otherwise you’ll lose months of fucking editing work when your files become corrupt and won’t fucking open anymore and you’re so spewing you could cry except you already ARE crying because you missed out on going to see the Dolly Parton concert that you had VIP tickets for AND you have to get your shit done yesterday ’cause it’s only 46 more god damn mother fucking days ’til Christmas fuck cunt prick shit mother fucker

And how’s YOUR day going?

Jeeesus the last 5 weeks has gone by fast!

Sydney tour is done & dusted

And now it’s time to kick off my solo shows in Western Australia

Game on!

THURSDAY 25th August, COWARANUP (Cowie Club) 08 9755 5190

SATURDAY 27th August, NORTHAM (Northam Country Club) 08 9622 1050

I’m not sure why this picture ended up so big on here, it’s all stretched out and fucked up

And by fucked up, I mean totally out of proportion to the point where I look way thinner

So yeah, I’m leaving it like that.