HOW CAN I BE UNDER YOU (WHEN I’M NOT OVER HIM)

By BECCY COLE & TAMARA STEWART

How can I be under you when I’m not over him

How can I just give you one when I’m still suffering

I’m not saying you don’t pop my cork it’s just the state I’m in

So how can I be under you when I’m not over him

I guess you thought I fell for you

But under lights so dim

A few more wines and a doxen beers

You’d almost look like him

But he’s on a beach in Bali

Sipping wine with his new flame

While I’m on my back in Bundaberg

Calling you by his name

How can I be under you when I’m not over him

How can I just give you one when I’m still suffering

I’m not saying you don’t pop my cork it’s just the state I’m in

So how can I be under you when I’m not over him

I guess I’m not the kid of girl

Who goes for one-night flings

I was raised on fairytales

Where good Queens get their Kings

But out here in the real world

Cinderella’s lost her shoe

And by the time that clock struck midnight

I’d lost me knickers too

How can I be under you when I’m not over him

How can I just give you one when I’m still suffering

I’m not saying you don’t pop my cork it’s just the state I’m in

So how can I be under you when I’m not over him

TAKE IT LIKE A MAN

By KEVIN BLOODY WILSON
BOTH BARRELS MUSIC

Darling thank you

For the brand-new, super-duper dildo

You say that it’s

The biggest one they had

But I’m PMT

And if that’s meant for me

Then there’s been a change of plans

So bend over – and take it like a man’

Darling bend over

And take it like a man

Let’s share the pleasure, darlin’

Let me show how much I care

So spread those hairy butt-cheeks in the air

And bend over

And take it like a man’

Darling, gonna thank you

With the brand-new super-duper dildo

With you tied spread-eagled

Face down on the bed

And I’ve bolted it on to

The Black ‘n’ Decker

So lift your arse up in the air

And bend over

And take it like a man’

CHORUS

Darling, so thank you

For the brand-new super-duper dildo

As I dunk it in

The jar beside the bed

Was that KY gel

Or chilli sauce?

I could not give a damn

Just bend over

And take it like a man’

CHORUS